Hi, Papah!

Semoga istirahat tenang di sana ya, Pah.

Irin lagi dalam fase sadar dan berusaha menerima fakta that you really will not back to this world. I still need you, frankly. But the fact that you were passed away.

Help me through this, Pah, can you? Hahahah silly question. I hope you the best, dan disayang sama Tuhan. He must be love you, you really the luckiest person ever. Proud to be your daughter. Miss you so bad right now. You know? somehow to make this dramatic, I plaid Chicago songs and cried litres of tears and hoping that after the tears I will be better, it does help me, but sometimes I miss you like I really want to run and hug you just like the old days. Even when I were always far from you, just knowing that you are home and I can meet you every time I want to, really strengthen me. I did this and that, I want you to proud of me, and until the last time of your life, I show you nothing. 

Papah, I am sorry I can not be your best daughter, I should spent more time with you, I should take a really good care of you, I should show you more than this. I should be a better person, please forgive me.